一只想停的飛鳥(續集)

在今天AFC的退修會的尾聲，我們同工有分享祈禱的時候。我跟同工分享我上星期"一只想停的飛鳥"。
正當我們在祈禱時，突然間我腦海裡出現了一段聖經 ───── 創世記第八章。

4七月十七日，方舟停在亞拉臘山上。
5水又漸消，到十月初一日，山頂都現出來了。
6過了四十天，挪亞開了方舟的窗戶，
7放出一隻烏鴉去；那烏鴉飛來飛去，直到地上的水都乾了。
8他又放出一隻鴿子去，要看看水從地上退了沒有。
9但遍地上都是水，鴿子找不著落腳之地，就回到方舟挪亞那裡，挪亞伸手把鴿子接進方舟來。
10他又等了七天，再把鴿子從方舟放出去。
11到了晚上，鴿子回到他那裡，嘴裡叼著一個新擰下來的橄欖葉子，挪亞就知道地上的水退了。
12他又等了七天，放出鴿子去，鴿子就不再回來了。
13到挪亞六百零一歲，正月初一日，地上的水都乾了。挪亞撤去方舟的蓋觀看，便見地面上乾了。
14到了二月二十七日，地就都乾了。

第9節：但遍地上都是水，鴿子找不著落腳之地

神好像在禱告中教導我，凡事都有定時定義，應以正面去向看，全件事的感覺就不同了。
我可能正是神放的烏鴉或鴿子...hmm...！

Bearing the cross

Last night during our fellowship discipleship program, we came across the meaning of bearing the cross "背十字架的意義".

This morning I got an email from one of the sisters in our group quoting Baker Encyclopaedia of Bible-Chinese Version about the meaning.

除了上述約2,000年前在猶大地、耶穌基督釘在其上的那個十字架的神學意義外，這個十字架對今日信徒也有它的象徵意義。

背負十字架。新約記載耶穌以「背十字架來跟從衪」為作門徒的必要條件的教訓共有5處，主要分兩種不同說法：一為否定式，見於馬太福音十章38節和路加福音十四章27節；另一為肯定式，見於馬太福音十六章24節、馬可福音八章34節和路加福音九章23節。耶穌的說話有兩個重點：第一是源於罪犯自負十字架走到刑場的比喻，說明作門徒的必要條件便是天天為基督的緣故捨棄一切和受苦（路九23）。其中心要義不是受死，而是受辱，門徒必須準備好被社會丟棄。第二個重點可能源出以西結書九章4-6節，該處提到凡義人要被「畫記號在額上」，以跟惡人區別。那「記號」是希伯來字母表上最後一個字母，古寫為「Ｘ」或「十」。有人將「背十字架」視為認信的象徵，標明在末日歸屬耶穌。然而，無論怎樣解釋，背十字架顯然是象徵自我否定和甘願受苦。

Wow... I like this one “不是受死，而是受辱，門徒必須準備好被社會丟棄”…
Somehow, to me, 受辱 is much worser than 受死…
Hmm… “門徒必須準備好被社會丟棄”… good suggestion…

一只想停的飛鳥

在過去的幾個星期，心裡一直跟神在鬥氣：神呀，為什麼這...為什麼那...

上個星期簡直就是一個活死人，人是生的，心是死的。心裡沒有激動，只有孤單。沒有信任，不斷的被蠶食。晚上睡不了，日間工作不知作甚，只有麻木地過日子。

我問神，為什麼人人都有歸宿，有落腳的地方‧‧‧而我 ─ 卻仍在不斷的尋索。人家經常取笑說我是一只沒有腳的鳥，不懂得停下來，進入另一個階段的生活。試問又有誰能明白到我卻是一只想停的飛鳥? 很累，想停下來，卻沒有願意收留的人與地。

不過神對我很好。正當這只想停的飛鳥心中困惑，考慮是否應該放棄而停止動翼的時候,神派遣使者在不同場合告訴我祂是在等我的。星期二使者祈禱會之中，同工要我們幻想自己是一只飛鳥，一只可以自由自在地飛的鳥。我心在想，唉，自由?我不想自由啦，我只想一個棲身之所!!! 此時，同工帶出一首歌 ─ 尋找：

我曾經像一只小小飛鳥
飛躍在這藍天海上
我無時無刻彷惶無助
找不到可以傾述
我曾經像一只小小飛鳥
穿梭在這城市之中
我正在尋找那慈愛雙手，那就是主耶穌

主啊我要回到你身旁，我要回到你身旁
那慈愛雙手正等著我，來擁抱我
主啊我要回到你身旁，我要回到你身旁
那慈愛雙手來擁抱我，那就是主耶穌

此時此刻，心中好像得著一個當頭棒喝! 可是仍很硬頸的跟神說，我知道你的手是在等我，可是每當我以為那個是你的手的時候，卻有人告訴我：「客滿，請過主」「對不起，這裡不歡迎你」「我們跟你的心不一樣，請便」「這個地方不適合你」「另外的比較適合你，不要到我這裡來」最痛的，莫過於一句「我不想接受你」

神啊，不是我不想停下來，是你的容身之處不容我呀!!! 神呀，你吩咐我等，我等；你吩咐我做的，我做；你還想我怎樣? 我真的很累，很痛，很苦。

星期三，我作了一個很不想作的決定，可是我覺得這個決定應對我尊重的人好一點，給他少一些麻繁。我作了這個決定後，不錯，心中輕鬆了很多，可是卻很不舒服，恐怕相反地會帶出更多、更複雜的問題‧‧‧不過，要說的話說了，要是錯，就讓神幫這個"不孝子""執手尾"好了...

星期五，放假，去Gym。正當一心在跑步時，不知為何孤寂卻在我心的另一邊走出來。等，一個越來越不喜歡的字。近在眼前卻遠在天邊，心中苦又有誰知? 一曲合唱版「誰明浪子心」完全反映了我的心境。我跟神說：「夠了，我不想再等，請告訴我我可以放棄等待。」我要被釋放，要放棄等，可惜，神真的在跟我開玩笑。兩小時後，一個電話改變了我的週末，我知神又在告訴我一個我討厭的字：「等!」神像在告訴我：「沒有我的批准，誰給你放棄的權利? 等!」唉，在那一刻，我真的想一死了之，神啊，為什麼要我活在這種「等」的痛苦之中呢?

神真的無所不知，無所不能，有些時候我真的寧願聽不到祂的聲音，不知道祂的眷顧，不認為祂在聽我的禱告。在這個痛苦困惱之時，團契敬拜時，當projector俏俏的打出了「主啊我要回到你身旁，我要回到你身旁」，同一首詩歌，四日內兩次，我知道神在眷顧，聽我的禱告。

可是神啊‧‧‧救救我吧　一把年紀了　一個愛人都沒有
孤獨是可憐的　如果沒愛過　人生是黑白的
神啊　救救我吧　一個人晃了半輩子了　
為什麼 我這樣的男人哪　就快要絕種　她呢　又在哪兒

這首歌不單是其他人的歌聲，也真的是在寫我的心聲‧‧‧

神啊，我知道你是信實的，是聽禱告的，求你，求你聽我的禱告‧‧‧

主啊我要回到你身旁，我要回到你身旁
那慈愛雙手正等著我，來擁抱我
主啊我要回到你身旁，我要回到你身旁
那慈愛雙手來擁抱我，那就是主耶穌

我不是甚麼，我是一只想停的飛鳥。

夜的心曲

詩的對話




d120417694／星

不敢親叩熟悉的數字
那會驚動沉睡中的相思
若是它又如昔一般
空蕩蕩只有響聲不止
怕傷了那內心僅存的絲毫自尊

好努力的想把所有當成是空無
怎都卻是欲走還留
送我的那張畫像必定是深情的餽贈
雖然回憶是遍體的傷痕
但感覺時仍舊溫柔而完整

親愛的請讓夜風為我一路加溫
為妳寫下的詩是躍動的音符
那是最摯最真
也是珍愛一生不變的靈魂

http://www.yoshow.com.tw/poetry.php?id=309836

True Leader - Jim Berney

Today I attend the memorial service of former president of IV Canada, Mr. Jim Berney.

In the eyes of his friends and co-worker, he is a good leader. In terms of:
• Sacrifice first
• Take the responsiblity
• Observer - open up and observe...!
• Prepare well amd listen well
• Learner - keep learning
• "WE"
• Scripture as life
o Let IT live in us
o Did it...!
• Renew the trust of everyone
• Vision for others
o maximize other's ability
o Encouragement and support
o Care
• "Make mistakes - there are going to be a lot of mistakes, but forgiveness exist in this system"
• Leader of leaders

Can I do it...? I really hope so...

Relieved but Unhappy

Relieved but Unhappy... What an ironic feeling...!

Don't ask me details... please. However, what I can tell you is that... its just a day of emotions and frustrations. The feeling is like you have to give up something. This "something" is something you have dreamt of for so long and now you have the chance to own it. But for just a little while, now you have to give up.

If its should not belongs to me, why given to me at the first place...?

Sigh...

龔如心逝世 積財328億無福消受

龔如心用了超過15年時間，左爭右奪，用盡諸般方式把300億遺產袋袋平安，可惜換來的只享受到18個月亞洲第一富婆的稱號。到最後，不單結果兩手空空一無所有，積財328億無福消受，更換來不少的非議，值得嗎？

很喜歡 “原審法官任懿君曾在原審時引用《聖經》詩篇的一句﹕「世人行動實係幻影。他們忙亂，真是枉然。積聚財富，不知將來有誰收取﹖」”(詩39：6)

莫非名利權力真的這樣重要嗎？


龔如心昨逝世[15:15]

華懋集團主席龔如心昨日在養和醫院病逝，享年69歲，較早時傳出她患上癌症。
華懋集團發表聲明，指集團主席王龔如心在4月3日逝世，將會另行公布喪禮的安排。
龔如心身家豐厚，在《福布斯》去年3月公布全球富豪榜，龔如心排行第154，估計去年身家達328億港元，成為亞洲第一女富豪。她與家翁王廷歆的世紀爭產案亦同樣矚目，爭產案糾纏了多年終由龔如心獲勝訴，接管丈夫遺下的300多億元財產，王廷歆則要支付6億元訟費。
但龔如心透過律師表示，為了保持家庭和諧，決定不會向王廷歆追討訟費，亦不追究王廷歆未有按法庭命令，披露誰人向他借出4100萬元打官司，世紀爭產案終於告一段落。

龔如心傳奇一生[15:37]

華懋主席龔如心昨病逝，她一生傳奇，最為人關注為其丈夫王德輝被綁架案及與家翁爭產案。

1955年9月29日，正是龔如心19歲生辰，她與當時21歲的王德輝結婚。王龔兩家是世交，龔如心小時候經常到王家玩耍。後來龔父去世，龔如心在1955年初，由老家上海來港投靠王家。不久，龔如心順理成章嫁入王家，與青梅竹馬的王德輝展開傳奇的一生。

在眾人眼中，王龔婚後十分恩愛。王德輝在1990年被綁架前3個月，夫婦二人去了一次歐洲旅行，他們返港後，王更向他展示在歐洲所買的兩折西裝「戰利品」。每天早上，夫婦二人會拖洋狗結伴在山頂百祿徑舊居跑步約1小時，之後才結伴返華懋上班。

龔如心愛夫心切，王德輝被綁架時，她在極短時間內，多次籌得巨額贖金，她甚至曾表示願以自己性命交換丈夫的安危。1983年夫妻首度被綁後，龔怕夫觸怒匪徒，甚至要求以己代夫。匪徒先釋放龔如心，龔在7日內籌得1100萬美元，匪徒於4日後釋放王。

90年王德輝再被綁架，當時匪徒勒索6000萬美元，並要求龔如心在10天內付半數贖金。但後因綁匪取消銀行戶口，餘款才沒有被提出，王自此亦下落不明。龔後來派人往各地搜尋找王德輝下落。

由於王德輝失蹤，王的父親王廷歆與龔展開一場糾纏8年的世紀爭產官司，雖然龔如心先輸兩場，最後卻「戲劇性」擊倒家翁王廷歆，反敗為勝，重奪價值約400億元的資產。

原審法官任懿君曾在原審時引用《聖經》詩篇的一句﹕「世人行動實係幻影。他們忙亂，真是枉然。積聚財富，不知將來有誰收取﹖」。

新聞來源：明報即時新聞

My First Spanish Class

Oh Boy... my first class of Spanish... its horrible.

The teacher is terrific... just only me is having a tough time.

As being a slow learner in language, I can feel that I am very behind in the class. Especially when 5 out of eight know French. I am still trying to find the way to pronounce the "RR" sound... Sigh...

But I am sure I can make it... Please pray for me...

My LA Trip Photos

My LA Trip Photos:

Mar 8: Hungtington Beach + Orange County / Santa Ana
Mar 9: LA
Mar 10: Joshua Tree National Park
Mar 11: Santa Monica

My Panama Mission Trip Photos

My Panama Mission Trip Photos

Panama Youth Camp (1/2)
Panama Youth Camp (2/2)

Panama Mission Trip Photos (1/2)
Panama Mission Trip Photos (2/2)
Panama - David City Photos

My first ski in 2007

Thanks God for giving me some snow on Friday so that I can enjoy my first ski trip in this winter season :-P, and probably the last of the season :(

Well, not having any exercises for the month in Panama, after two hours of skiing, I am sooooooooo tired... my legs almost aren't mine anymore...

Simon suspended indefinitely for slash

Chris Simon was suspended indefinitely Friday by the NHL, one day after his vicious two-handed stick swing to the face of New York Rangers forward Ryan Hollweg.

Thanks God that I am not living in the Hockey world, otherwise I think I will be like Chris or Sean Avery.

After Chris' incident, so many people are making so many comments blaming him for not respect other players or should have think twice before he acts.

Well, you guys who are slow-thinker and consider yourselves always think twice before your action, please, can you give us a break?

Yeah, I agree that it is not wise to lose our cool when we got angry, and its absolutely not right to use force like this. But come on, its not our fault for thinking fast and act fast. We just can't control it. Can you control yourself so that you can think faster when needed? Hey, yes, we need to improve ourselves... but why not I hear your appreciation when our fast-thinking help you out when you need it? But its always "comments" when we make our mistakes?

Does that mean you those "slow-thinker" or "think twice" type will not make mistakes or making wrong decisions? Or are those mistakes just doesn't look that bad enough to be overblown and draw all the attention to it? Why it always have to make us look that bad when things happen?

Thanks for the comment from Islanders defenceman Brendan Witt, Simon's roommate for six years when they played for the Washington Capitals. "Nobody is perfect in this world in any situation, and everyone has their moments."

Then why us? Please... before you criticize our think-fast/act-fast characteristics, "think-twice" about how our think-fast/act-fast have helped you out in the past. Thank you...!

Panama Update #6

Dear all,

I can’t imagine its already the last week of my mission trip.
Tonight (Monday night) I will have the last session with the youth group.
Tomorrow morning I will go Chinese Tea with an uncle (my friend’s father) and Rev. Ma.
At night, I will conclude my trip with the gathering join with the youth group and young career fellowship.
Wednesday, I will be taking the morning flight to LA to meet my high school friends before heading back to Canada on Sunday. (Please pray for me for a safe trip…!)

For the past weekend, I flied to a city named David for a weekend trip. I visited there last year.
I have many visits for Saturday and Sunday together with the Sunday School and Sunday worship. The brothers and sisters there are very good and supportive. But I am so careless that I forget to bring my camera, thus, not much photos. (Sigh…)
Please pray for them if you can, their desperate need right now: spiritual support.

I have to finish here. I will post some of my photos in my website (http://webhome.idirect.com/~xteam/) and/or visit my blog (http://stupidxteam.blogspot.com/) after I come back to Canada.

Again, thank you for all your prayers, encouragement and support throughout the past month.

See you all in Canada…
Take care,
Kelvin

Panama Update #5

Dear all,

It was a weekend with a lot of grace and thanksgiving for me.

On Friday, while attending a workshop by another short term mission team from Toronto, I have a chance to chat with a young lady who had marriage problem. She is willing to believe in Jesus, but the problem is she does not understand how Jesus can help her. She did not convert at the end, but she agrees to come to church more to learn more.

Saturday morning, we visit a family whose son turn to Christ half year ago. They did not agree their son to go to church, so we pay a visit to them and try to understand the reason. The scheduled 30-mins visit turned out to be a 3.5 hours tour about Christianity. From why going to church, to what is Christianity, to why not going to church. The chat is wonderful as the father agrees to let his son to go to Church (although he still not agrees with Christianity). May his son be the blessing of the family.

Second visit of the day came to a teen call Chiu. He was in the Chinese youth camp and turned to Christ two years ago. However, during this period, he had gone to church only occasionally. This time I try to connect him with one of the Alliance church close to his home. He did go to church with me on Sunday, but pray that he will connect with the church and start going there regularly.

In the evening, after sharing at the 6th anniversary of the youth fellowship, a medical student who came from HK a long while ago came to me and we have an hour of discussion about Christianity. Thanks God for opening his heart during the discussion. He almost made the decision, but he back off at the very last minute. I believe God has His own timing. Please pray for him and hope that he can convert in a short while.

Sunday night, I went out with the youth group to a place called Amador. A long walk with seashore on both side of the road and can clearly see the sunset. The night was wonderful as not only I have the chance to chat with them on the 2 hour walk, but I also experience the first ever dinner-karaoke in Panama…!

10 more days in Panama, please keep praying for me and the ministry here in Panama. Thanks.

In Christ,
Kelvin

Panama Update #4

Dear all,

Time really flies. Already 2 weeks have gone and only 2 weeks left here in Panama. This morning, all other STM members have gone and I will move on with ministries in another Church… 巴拿馬華人基督教會.

PTL, on Chinese New Year Day, we have a wonderful program and the Alliance Church with more than 100 people come for the celebration. We have drama, games, songs and message sharing. Three people converted on the night. Halleluiah…!

About the Youth Camp, PTL that we have 92 youth attending the camp. During the camp, 19 of them converted or reconfirmed their faith to God, while 46 of them re-commit the life to God, with 9 of them commit themselves for full time ministry offering. It was wonderful.

On Monday and Tuesday, together two other STM member, Audrey and Jordan, we have an opportunity to go camping/beach swimming with a group of young people. The beach is so nice and it was a wonderful to have fun with so many young people here in Panama.

For the next two weeks, I will be visiting some of the youth from camps and helping out with fellowships. Please keep praying for me.

Some of you may have missed my previous updates, sorry my bad, please visit my blog @ http://stupidxteam.blogspot.com/

Again, thank you for you prayer support.
Kelvin

Panama Update #3

Dear all,

Happy New Chinese New Year…!

Thank you for your prayer and support.

Yesterday (Friday) we have our closing ceremony for the Panama Youth Camp. PTL that we have 92 coming to the camp. About one-third of them are non-Christian, and we have around 2/3 converted during the camp. Halleluiah…!

Please keep praying for us as we are having a Chinese New Year Program Sunday night. The church just moved into the new building and b/s need adaptations, and the new comers too…

Thank you for your prayer and your prayer support are very important to STM and the ministry. We will be glad to have your prayer support… Feel free to pass these prayer items to your fellowship. I will try to update you again after the program.

Thanks

Kelvin

Panama Update #2

Dear all,

Late Friday night, after a fellowship program at Living Water AC, the final pieces of STM team finally arrived. Don’t think that I am talking about any person, I am talking about luggage. Three of our STM members who come Thursday night and Friday morning, all have their luggage delayed in US and not able to arrive with the person. But thanks God, they are here now and everyone can have everything settled with no worries.

Thanksgiving items:

(1) Beside the above, we also have the opportunity to start some visitations besides camp preparation. During the visitation Friday, there is a little girl of age 13 not sure if she able to go to the camp. Pray that God will provide her the way to connect with the gospel.

(2) Thanks the Lord that all team members have arrived in Panama safely and promptly.

(3) Friday night, STM hold a fellowship program in Living Water AC with “Singspiration” as focus and having a fun time with all the teens.

(4) Until midnight Friday, we have 75 participants for the Panama Youth Camp. PTL for so many youth able to come to the camp.



Prayer items:

(1) Panama Youth Camp: Saturday night meeting for STM with local workers. Please pray for communication and cooperation.

(2) On Sunday, STM will split into two groups and will be serving the service in both Ling Fung AC and Living Water AC.

(3) Panama Youth Camp (Feb 12-16): Pray for all youth participants, for their safety and their ability to listen to the Word of God.

(4) PYC: Please pray for Auntie Esther (main speaker) and all workshop speakers.

(5) Feb 16,17 evening: Living Water AC Teens Night

(6) Feb 17,18 morning: Living Water AC Children Weekend

(7) Feb 18: Ling Fung AC move into the new building

(8) Feb 18: Chinese New Year Celebration @ Ling Fung AC new building

Thank you for your prayer and your prayer support are very important to STM and the ministry. We will be glad to have your prayer support… Feel free to pass these prayer items to your fellowship. I will try to update you before the camp starts on Monday.

In Christ
Kelvin











Kelvin Fung

University Ministry Associate

Ambassadors for Christ in Canada

416.494.7171

Panama Day 1

Thank you for all your support and prayer.

I had arrived safely in Panama Tuesday night and the weather here is nice and warm, although they told us that it’s a much hotter summer than they usually have. Under the great sunny weather, we are in action on Wednesday.

Today, we are able to re-connect with a group of young leaders who commit themselves in student ministry and the youth camp. We were quickly updated about the latest preparation and we are glad that we can get involved quickly into the last stage of preparation of the youth camp. The camp will start next Monday.

Thanksgiving items:

(1) Elaine, sister from Calgary, and I had a safe trip from Toronto/Calgary to Panama through Huston
(2) We are able to have a discussion with the youth camp workers and knowing the latest situation and how we can involved.
(3) At this moment, we got around 60 registrations for the Panama youth camp next week and expecting to have around 40 registrations more coming.

Prayer items:

(1) Pray for Panama Youth Camp (Feb 12-16)
(2) Pray for the heart of the students/youth who come to the camp (expecting to have 100-120 students)
(3) Pray for wisdom and strength for the local workers in their last invitation effort
(4) Pray for the cooperation between local workers and the short term mission team.
(5) Pray for the safety for all STM members who will travel to Panama on Thursday and Friday
(6) Pray for the Chinese New Year Program on Chinese New Year Day (Feb 18)
(7) Pray for the health and strength for STM members



Please pray hard for us and feel free to pass these prayer items to your fellowship.

We will be glad to have your prayer support…

I will try to update you when possible.

先苦後甜 方力申

What a good song...!

先苦後甜 方力申

曲 : Walter Wong 詞：李峻一
編 : Johnny Yim 監 : Gary Chan

你拋不開 手裡的工作
亦追跟趕 到校舍趕接放學
在幼年時给我雪糕天天買一個
夜深一點 教導我功課
待天一光 又來催我上學堂
你在昨天 辛苦太過

＊所有父母 也盼子女成材
就算他 獎與罰也總帶著愛
世上哪個 如父母親愛

＃我會漸成大器(今天我願生性)
使雙親最喜悅是要爭氣
不忍使你失望盡我全力
奔波一世的你 艱辛的困境扶育我
羽翼漸盛現已高飛
講不出那感謝便唱给你
輕撫你皺紋段段舊事再憶記
當我自小拖緊你
舉首凝視 似是大樹護蔭的你

彈指之間 歲月巳飄去
父子之間 總也有歡笑眼淚
在血緣能找到 萬般的親抹不去
漫畫書本 不要我偷看
學多一點 未來少一些出錯
你在昨天 叮囑過我

Repaet ＊＃

往日難為是你 日夕掛心
如今將最好都送贈你
從前頑童成熟了 求你別皺眉

Repaet (＃)

盼未來能讓我 努力 報答你

「新九品芝麻官」的有感而發

近日跟朋友、學生等談論電視劇時，不知為何，正當大多數人都覺得「新九品芝麻官」既無聊又無意思時，我卻對這劇「每天愛你多一些」。

可能是我對內裡的人物角色的描寫，產生了莫名其妙的親切感。

宋世傑的自負、矛盾於自我了解及沒勇氣打開心窗之間
陳夢吉的多情卻不知情為何物
劉華東的自作聰明、賤
方唐鏡的自卑、好賭之心
陸小鳳的猶豫不決、無膽、衝動

唉‧‧‧好像每個角色都在提醒著我自己的缺點‧‧‧
原本這些缺點也不是太大不了，不過，問題在於我沒有這些角色的優點

陸小鳳的背景家財
方唐鏡的敢作敢為、敢愛敢恨
劉華東的足智多謀、洞悉先機
陳夢吉的果斷無悔
宋世傑的快人快語、隨機應變、轉危為機

唉‧‧‧莫非，來來去去，我只是一個感情用事、死皮賴臉的 ─── 窩囊??‧‧‧哈哈哈!!!