Wednesday, October 31, 2007

天灰

天灰

lovetanya/★↗FREEDO

男孩的眼神直盯著那些女孩走了之後,所留下來的東西,男孩從沒想過女孩曾那麼用心的注視著他。

有關於女孩的事,男孩一直是到兩個禮拜前才完全知道,兩個禮拜前男孩收到由女孩母親寄來的信,上面寫滿了女孩給男還的話,還有一本日記本。

男孩打開了那本日記的第一頁,男孩的回憶也隨著日記本的開啟回到了中學的時代,那時女孩面上戴著口罩,一副因病而顯得疲憊的樣子,她低著頭,緩緩地在走廊上經過。男孩在一旁看著她,欲言又止的,這時,女孩的朋友上前來挽著她的手臂催她向前走,男孩就這樣看著她離開了。

2002年11月22日(陰):「下午開始熱了起來,大家都去上體育課了,只剩下我一個人,心情有點灰……」女孩坐在空無一人的課室裡,提筆寫起日記。她只覺得,沒有人理會她,整個世界仿佛只有自己一人,而巳,她不知道,就在對面的課室,男孩也在空無一人的課室裡,拿著筆,凝視著她,畫起這個女孩的人像畫來。

提起照相機,女孩把學校的每一個角落也拍了照,她希望可以把回憶都停住在底片內……

在學校的醫療室內,女孩正躺臥著。護士替她注射點滴。女孩的眼角,流下了一滴淚,是因為身體很痛?還是心已經很疲憊了?

2002年12月2日(雨):「365個打針吃藥的日子,甚麼時侯才會停止?」

男孩放了一瓶鮮奶在三樓宿舍的露台上,女孩弱不禁風慢慢的來到,眼前卻不見男孩的蹤跡。當她來到欄邊拿起溫暖的鮮奶瓶的時候,她低下頭,攝入眼底的是一副圖畫,是她自己的畫像……是男孩,他偷偷地用粉筆,在石地上留下了女孩的蹤跡……一陣暖意,湧上了女孩的心上……

2002年12月3日(陰):「終於,無法再上課了……」女孩收拾好東西,步出了這個校園,鐵絲網的另一邊,男孩悲傷的遠送著她,他不敢走上前,因為他不知道女孩的心裡到底有沒有她,他可以做的,只有默默地目送著她離開……

生活依舊照常,男孩在籃球場上繼續與朋友一起活動,女孩偷偷的坐在遠處,用照相機把男孩的每一個神情也拍下。每一個眼神,每一個動作,女孩都努力地把它們留下來,因為她不知道,她還可以撐多久……

3年了,女孩已經離開了校園1095個日子。她的病情日益嚴重,女孩只能待在家裡,牆上貼滿的都是他的照片,她,從沒有忘記過他……

2005年四月三日(陰):「今天在網上的討論區開了一個標題–「關於宋哲緯?」每打一個字,手總覺得是非常沉重,問自己,這樣做! 有用嗎?自己是想尋找這個人嗎?還是……只希望確定他的心意就夠了?」

2005年五月六日(雨):「今天開的標題有人回覆了,心裡感到一陣憾動,是因為自己的堅持感動了上天嗎?看著一個個的留言,腦裡一片空白,坐在電腦前的自己只懂哭,眼淚就這樣崩潰地湧了出來……」

男孩想也沒想到,女孩曾用網路找他的下落,而且還有熱心的人士回答她的問題。

男孩看著日記的最後留下的網誌密碼和帳號,動了滑鼠,直盯著電腦的螢幕,然後開始打下女孩網誌的帳號與密碼,看著一篇篇女孩打下的文章,直到看到了最後一篇,吸引著男孩的注意,標題是「最後一天…再也無法」,點了下滑鼠,看到了內容

「我的病已經到了極限,最終我還是無法知道你的心意,

知道的只是,關於你最近的事,

我好想、好想知道你的心意,也好想回到中學時,

但‥已經來不及了。

我無法確定自己還能活多久,我只要知道你過的好就夠了。

再也無法繼續的喜歡著你。」

看完了最後一篇的網誌,男孩的眼淚,止不住的滴了下來,男孩用了自己的帳號和密碼,給了女孩一個回應。

「不管是哪時候,我都喜歡妳,我也想讓妳知道我的心意。」同時也在女孩的網誌,播放出了S H E 的『天灰』

《如果你不再出現 我的世界 還有什麼可貴
可惜不夠時間 讓我們試驗 什麼叫永遠
想念變成懷念 心動變成心碎
偏偏還會關切 你最後屬於誰


我的天空今天有點灰 我的心是個落葉的季節
 我不知道如何度過今夜 所有的燈早已經全都熄滅
如果你從沒出現 我會不會 覺得快樂一些
可惜殘忍時間 總要把諾言 一點點摧毀》

聽著歌曲的同時,男孩移動了滑鼠,上了奇摩的知識﹢,用著顫抖的手一個字、一個注音、一個鍵盤的打著,「關於宋哲緯?」

看著一個個的留言,他的心情和女孩一樣,眼淚沒有停過,一直湧出來…

2005年11月28日,coca留:「我記得我有個國中同學,好像是叫宋哲緯吧!」

2005年11月29日,小安留:「他好像有繼續畫畫,後來畢業了,考上美術系。系上劇! 團的海報,都是找他幫忙畫的,我們跟他很熟呢,你想找他嗎?」

他也照樣的補上了他的留言。

2007年11月30日,宋哲緯留:『不管是落葉,不管是陰天,天灰永遠會變成晴天,你在找我嗎?』知識﹢的回答,多了男孩的回應。

男孩看著牆上的那幅他畫她的畫像,男孩合上女孩的日記本,卻在那一瞬間男孩注意到寫在日記最後的右下方的一段話

2005年11月30日︰

天灰的歌詞裡,有一段寫著

『如果你不再出現 我的世界 還有什麼可貴
可惜不夠時間 讓我們試驗 什麼叫永遠』
時間的催促,讓我們沒時間去試驗 什麼叫永遠,是這樣嗎?
今天是我的生日,你記得嗎?

在前一天,有人回應了我的問題,我想這就是我最好的禮物了。


我一直‥都喜歡著你。
Jenny筆 11.30

男孩突然想起今天是女孩的生日,拿起外套與另一張女孩的畫像,走出門,打算去為她上香、順便看看她。

男孩走到了墳墓前對女還說︰「這是妳最喜歡的楓葉,還有我畫的畫,這些都是我送妳的生日禮物,雖然遲了些…但我想妳會接受,也會很珍惜的,還有謝謝妳曾那麼喜歡我。」

男孩說完,突然吹起了一陣風,把楓葉和畫像一起吹走,這陣風,彷彿是女孩對男孩所講的話做的回應,也像是接受了,男孩所送的禮物。

那陣風,很輕,很柔,似乎在訴說著︰謝謝。

男孩看著女孩所留下的日記與照片,日記再也沒有女孩的字跡;學校的山頭也沒有了女孩的蹤影。女孩微笑的神情停留在男孩手握的照片中,她的笑容,依靠是那樣的溫婉。男孩的手輕輕滑過女孩照片上冰冷的長髮,彷佛女孩從沒離開過,現在可以懷念女孩的,就只有這個辦法吧……


(節錄自優秀文學網)


Friday, October 26, 2007

Happy... Not Happy

Happy today, as I can safely arrive home... :)
Not happy, as my luggages were all rip off inside out by the US security... they took out my sample size samples by the airlines whick i carried around for the whole trip. Pass though all the check point, but not the last one... They also broke the luggage lock of one of two checked bags... They unpack the the other checked bag, rearranged but badly repacked, my cleansing form were leaked, making all the stuff dirty, luckly can clean...:(

Happy, got back home and finally can enjoy my TV... :)
Not happy, all the last few weeks recordings were mistakenly recorded as SAP and not Cantonese... :(

Happy, seeing all my brothers and sisters... :)
Not happy, knowing some of them are now in difficulties... :(

Happy, back home... :)
Not happy, home alone... :(




Saturday, October 20, 2007

Boston Trip Oct 20

My photo albums for today

Sightseeing
Quincy Market
Pumpkin Festival


HK -> Boston



24 hours in flight and airport really mean something: TIRED.

Everything goes ok, until arriving at Chicago. The flight to Boston was delayed, but even after boarding, another 1.5 hours. Finally we arrive in Boston at midnight, and get the car rental, arriving at Hong's about 1:30...

Thank you Hong...




HK Trip Oct 18

My very last day in HK, a busy day.

In the morning I pay a visit to Disneyland, oops… it should be the garden leading you to Disneyland. Yup…that’s good enough for me…
In the afternoon, having lunch with a student that went back to HK this school term.



As I am in Mongkok, so I am also picking up souvenirs that I bought for friends and good friends. Don’t worry friends, you will know what I am talking about when you have it.

Rushing to Chai Wan for a long-time friend, my used-to-be prayer partner… without him, I am sure I won’t be a servant of God now… He just came out for a drink and seeing each other for a short while. Raymond, thank you.
Making me the worst of the day is that I thought that the dinner tonight was at 8 before my student called. I was window shopping at Elements at the time… I rush there and I am glad that I rush there as the buffet was wonderful… thank you Pinky and your family…



Late night, I spent the last night with a friend who need a lot of support in HK...
and I do so by making her spending the night in Mongkok with a WHITE ball dress...
I feel sorry about her... but really appreciate the time we spend in HK last two weeks... thank you...! So, remember, when you feel lonely, there will always be friends, and of course I am one of them, in Canada who always support you... so, be strong....




Thursday, October 18, 2007

HK Trip Oct 17

今天不是十分開心...又或者應該話我今日的心情有好多起起跌跌,有開心,也有唔開心。。。有好多感觸...
下午,同QQ出去吃大家樂,好滋味,好開心...



然後,我去到九龍公園去咗睇學界游泳錦標賽,叫做去支持吓D小師弟。雖然我們只係全場第二,但係見到佢地個School Spirit,就十分開心,起碼一班師弟總算記得我地St. Joesph’s 的團結精神,將D自以為好勁的人教訓一吓,真開心,好感動。

晚上,本來同個朋友出去吃飯,但係佢公司好忙,佢完全出唔到嚟,唔係幾開心。不過,之後同咗一班以前基石的弟兄姊妹出咗去食飯同飲嘢,幾開心,因為真係無見佢地好耐。



我今日其實有D唏噓。點解?我都唔係好知。當我在尖東等我朋友的時候,我要去找東西吃。都唔知道係我在多倫多吃得太多,還是我個人真係無主見,我竟然係唔知道食甚麼好。然後我又見到人家一對對咁係尖東海旁,我自己就一個人做海明威的師弟,企住係到拍「青年與海」...

呢個時候,我就係到想,究竟係我真係唔知自己要甚麼,定係我真係好似這個香港之行D人話我嘅揀擇?唔知呢…我又唔覺我在揀,好似係人地揀我多D!好似我揀食甚麼一樣,係人都知我食甚麼都可以,咁點解我又揀唔到?我只係想要一D食咗之後會開心D的野食,咁都有錯?到最後,揀來揀去,都係揀番一開始就想食嗰間。唉!仲要去到最後都食唔到…!神啊,究竟我要等到幾時先可以揀到我又想要,佢又想揀我嘅呢?

唉…真係百般知味在心頭…!




Tuesday, October 16, 2007

HK Trip Oct 16

Lunch time, Stanley brings me to eat Mos Burger, good experience...!



At night, I have dinner with my former aquatics team member. We share about our memories of the oldies... Although its already in the past, it's one of the best moments in my life...!

Monday, October 15, 2007

HK Trip Oct 15

This morning I have an interview with an online radio show 葡萄樹傳媒. The interview take place at the store of a friend of mine. Wow, this store is crazy, everything is unique – everything is one of a kind…! And the price is good…! A hand-make one-of-a-kind T-shirt for only $200-300. Wanna pay a visit, check out here: http://tadpolestudio.com.hk/

I then have lunch with a long-time friend Jeffrey, an Zion Noiz member. Reconized him...?



Dinner with some returned Canadian friends, Shirley and Joanne. Yummy...




And finally I meet some TCCF alumni for a drink... Guys, really wanna to thankyou for giving me such a good time...





Sunday, October 14, 2007

HK Trip Oct 14

Today, I visit Yan Fook Church again. This time is for service.
It is a total different feeling compare to my visit to the building on thursday, Oct 12.



Last time when Pastor Vincent and Judy took me to walk around, the church was so quiet...

and today, the line up was huge, not only to get in, but to get out...

The sermon was not only great, but super...!

And... after Sunday service, I am glad to have dinner with some old friends from Ottawa. Really miss them... haven't seeing them for years...



In the afternoon, I have a drink with a mentor-type friend. He reminds me a lot... Yes... should I really think about leaving? Why think yourself to be the savior when people already think that you are satan? He reminds me about this:究竟是『眾人皆醉我獨醒』,還是『眾人皆醒我獨醉』? Talking about experience, they have more than you do. Spirtuality, they should be much better than you do. Maturity, forget it, how can I be more mature than they do? So, yeah, stop complaining. Stop bitter. Just shut up and work...!!!

At night, have dinner with Shirley. I enjoy everytime we chat, as it will always be encouraging... God, thank you for giving me this friend...




Saturday, October 13, 2007

HK Trip Oct 11-13

Window shopping and shopping...

HK things are cheap, but the only problem for me to travel in HK is also that reason. The things are cheap, but should I buy it or not? Why buying them? That is one of the struggle for me during these three days. I have no money to spend, so I have to control myself in using money. But when you saw the price, its so tempting...

Seeing Terry, Stanley, Alice and... Raymond thursday nite, so happy to see them. Most of them are back to church life, thanks God.



Friday afternoon, visit my home school at the interschool swimming competition. Wow... 24sec for C-grad 50 Freestyle, what a time...! I am old, really old. Especially when I leaving Kowloon Park with MTR and saw two of my little F1 schoolmates, they left with their parents carrying their swimming bags for them, really jealous...!

Thank you Michael for bringing me to have 大排擋食雞燉翅... yummy...!



Saturday daytime, running thru HK cemeteries to visit grandpa(s) and grandma... Bye, see you some years after, hopefully I will come back soon to visit you people again...

In the evening, my uncle brings me to 中環鏞記食燒鵝... make my HK trip so fulfilling...!

At night, thanks God for bringing me a friend to walk 廟街 with me, so that I don't need to go thru this historic part of Hong Kong alone.

Tomorrow will go 恩福 worship and seeing friends from my university years in Ottawa. Guys, I really miss you... see you tomorrow...!




Thursday, October 11, 2007

HK Trip Oct 8-10

Oct 8
I met up with another friend from Panama, Hugo, but sigh... again, forget to take pictures. We had a good time for the day, as we spent most of the time -- reading and buying books in Christian bookstores... :P Sorry Hugo...!!!

At night, I met up with Joanne, my lovely little sister, and Elita. The Japanese food is great and the shrimp and urchin sashimi are soooooooooooooo fresh.




And... Joanne, I will miss you...!!!

Oct 9
SJC Day...

I head back to SJC this afternoon, they change a lot.
New teachers room.
New lift.
New young female teachers...!!!
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=9827&l=83844&id=514761224

At night, I am so enjoy as I met up with some friends who have known each other for many many years, but haven't been in touch for many many years.
Yam, Vincent, Adem, Augustine, Trevor... I still remember those old days when we fight for the first place in the line... and I always WON...!!! yeah...



Oct 10

Meet up with Cindy this morning, Winnie in the afternoon, Judy and Okita in the evening.

Mrs. _____ : May God bless your marriage.
Miss Ko: Don't hesitate la... GO! Go! GO!
Miss Yeung: God will lead you for the best job and future... so remember: PRAY...! Trust me, He will guide you all the way...
Miss Lam: Don't sit there and work. Go out more...!!!





For more photos:
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=9830&l=ab0b7&id=514761224

Wednesday, October 10, 2007

HK Trip Oct 7

It was a wonderful Sunday for me.

In the morning
I was wondering if I were back to my homeland, as I knew less then ten sentences on the bus and walking to Sogo in CausewayBay... the whole area was full of Philippines. Mission is the only word occupying my mind... "oh NO! Please, just give me a break... Ha Ha" I told God.

The worship at Tung Fook Church was wonderful. It was energetic and touching. But the message was a bit short, as it was so good and I want to listen more...

In the afternoon
Elita and I walk thru the whole CausewayBay and WanChai (poor Elita... she was walking on heels...!) and we visit the famous (and old) Boston Restaurant. Its still that good...! We have FlameBeef, and taste very good.






If you have facebook, you can view the video here.
http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=18954691224

I also visit my place of early childhood: St. Joseph's College Primary School. So many memories... Wanna see my school? Click here...

In the evening
We met Adeline and we have the chance to watch the show "A Symphony of Lights" 「幻彩詠香江」. This nightly spectacle combines interactive lights of 44 key buildings on both Hong Kong Island and Kowloon with musical effects to showcase the vibrancy and glamorous night vista of Victoria Harbour. It is amazing...!

I put a bit into my facebook video:
Symphony of Lights 1 and Symphony of Lights 2

In the night
The Symphony of Lights inspired us to visit a place I haven't been there for around 20 years... THE PEAK...!!! Everything there were changed. New buildings, new bus terminal, higher bus fare, except one thing: the nightview is still the best...! Dear Lord, THANK YOU...!

You can view all the photos here





Monday, October 08, 2007

Hong Kong Trip Oct 4-6

Wow, after 16 years, i finally got the chance to really feel the home where I grow up... HONG KONG.

Oct 4
我今天有時間去行街,結果自己一個人去行旺角。沒有甚麼可以買,因為唔想用太多錢。但係都忍唔住係上次返香港時買左對波鞋的一間鞋店買了一對皮鞋。可能個sales見我問題都唔多條就買左對鞋,仲靜靜地比左對襪我。可能真係要多謝對面同個仔試同一款鞋個阿媽,佢由我入去個吓,到我走個陣都仲係問緊問題...哈哈...做我生意真係好易,只要你話係平靓正,個樣唔好比我覺得你騙我,你就可以騙到我的生意,幾好?!?!

多得無線套「天幕下的戀人」,我就係咁見到「朗豪坊」三個字就想入去睇下個天幕...哈哈,我都話好易tum架啦... 入去之後覺得個商場個design真係唔錯,不過個天幕就有點失望,可能是我太大期望啦... 又或者係自己一條友去天幕,邊會有feel呀? sigh...

Oct 5/6
Grandma is leaving us la... Bye...! When she is leaving, the picture of grandma's come up to my mind scene after scene... really 有點唔捨得...

Oct 6
可以係香港見到一個從巴拿馬到中國做工的女仔阿芳,見到佢又有返教會,人又開心,真係好放心。不過分手後才記得無同佢影相,真失敗...!

晚上同一個以前OCDA的姊妹Rita去了Soho一間coffee pub Pop Bites聽了一個都可以話係另頖的音響,有黃志淙同劉以達。原來劉以達真人真係正經過上鏡好多。





My Photos: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=9624&l=9ebce&id=514761224





Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Evan almighty

Today on the plane, God speaks to me through a movie: Evan Almighty...
It seems like God is telling me, God is teaching us through some unexpected circumstances. These teaching includes patience and love.

I always ask God why things gone so wrong, people around you are wondering if you are doing the right thing. Every things I do seems silly and no logical. With this movie, God is telling me: "Yes, there are things that seems like not ordinary, but its all under the hands of ME...!"

In the film, the main character was told by God to do something extraordinary, out of his regular routine and expected job description. No one support him, even his own wife. Risking of losing his job... Everyone thinks that he is crazy.

But he proved these people are wrong by his faith in God. His family returns and God save many people through him too... As long as we can keep our faith to God, there is nothing call impossible.

This matches what Rev. Peter Ho said last week. "What do we have to lose? Our face? come on..."

God, thank you...!

Quoting from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evan_Almighty

Newly elected to Congress, former local TV newsman Evan Baxter (Steve Carell) leaves Buffalo behind and shepherds his family to suburban northern Virginia. His congressional campaign declared that he would change the world, but he never stated how. Once he reaches his new home and job, strange things start to happen. Animals (all different kinds of animals) start following Evan around. He grows a beard that won't go away no matter how many times he shaves. Eight vacant lots in Evan's neighborhood are purchased in Evan's name. Stone age tools and wood planks are sent to his house. And the number 614 appears everywhere he goes. Evan soon learns that the number is a verse in the Bible. In the book of Genesis, 6:14 is the verse in which God instructs Noah to build the ark. Soon after, God (Morgan Freeman) appears and mysteriously commands him to build an ark because a flood is coming. His family comes to believe he is having an extraordinary mid-life crisis, but soon thinks he is truly onto something of Biblical proportions. God tells Evan the flood will come September 22 mid-day.


Evan and God sitting in the half-built Ark. Evan's costume was created based on research of the clothing at the time of Noah.[1] Some of the controversy over the film in foreign markets focused on God being portrayed in human form, as seen here.[2]Animals start following Evan to Congress causing him to eventually be suspended by Congressman Long (John Goodman) from work after he tells everyone that God told him to build an ark. His wife Joan and his three sons leave for her mother's house after seeing it on a news report, leaving him to build the ark himself, which gains international notice. Weeks after Joan leaves Evan, God appears to her as a waiter at a diner. He tells her that God doesn't give things, he gives the opportunity to get things. For example, God doesn't give a family togetherness, he gives the opportunity for families to be together. Seeing his meaning, Joan returns to Evan to finish the ark together. Evan's old colleagues tell him that Congressman Long built a dam over a nearby lake and cut corners to save businesses money.

September 22 comes with clear skies, and Evan loads the hundreds of animals onto the newly finished ark in front of live news crews and nearby citizens. Minutes pass with clear skies, so spectators start jeering at him. Dark clouds appear and rain starts pouring down. Evan tells everyone to board the ark but no one listens. The rain suddenly stops and everyone starts laughing at Evan. Evan thinks it's over until the poorly built dam bursts. Panic overtakes everyone and they board the ark. The ark sails down the streets of Washington D.C. from the flooded water of the burst lake until it eventually lands several feet from the Capitol. Evan tells Long that the flood was caused by his poorly made dam, which incites the other congressmen present to turn on him. Evan and his family go on a hiking trip over the weekend and God reappears to Evan, telling him that the way to change the world is by doing Acts of Random Kindness ("ARK") one at a time.




Monday, October 01, 2007

HK... I am coming...!

I am heading back to HK la... but with a sad note is to attend my grandma's funeral (bye bye grandma...)

For the next 18 days, I will be exposing myself to... sweat...!

For all canadaian friends... see you in a month...

My HK buddies, I can't wait to see you people...!!!